This week I picked up something nasty…

Woke up on Tuesday feeling like death warmed up. Was still feeling pretty awful come Saturday morning, when I’d volunteered my services as a litter-picker in Wallingford’s annual litter-pick, organised by the local charity, Wallingford 1155.

Fortunately, civic duty trumped sickness and I kitted up in my most attractive raincoat and collected a flattering hi-vis vest and claw. My area to litterpick was just a few streets away from home. A small close, bordered on both sides of the entrance by thick bushes. A cursory glance into the bushes showed they were a real treasure house of disgusting junk. And so my work began.

There was a fair amount of plastic in there, but in fairness, plastic wasn’t the worst thing to litterpick. It usually stays in one piece, after all (except for old carrier bags which shred as you try to pry them from their muddy beds). There was the organic matter – mostly large bones which presumably had been chewed over by someone’s dog at some stage. There were the rusted cans, or half-cans, nice and sharp and oozing with tetanus-flavoured possibility. There were the many, many glass bottles (mostly empty). And yes, there was a bit of dogs’ business (but I didn’t feel honour bound or had the right kit to pick that up).

Then there were the surprise bonus items. A five foot broom handle. Two large, semi-used paint pots. An empty keg of beer. The mats from the footwell of some car. The retractable cover for the boot of some other car. I stress again, this was all in a few feets’ worth of bushes in a quiet road in what passes for quite a respectable middle-class town. I only had three hours and though I did a lot, I was never gonna get it all.

By the end, I’d expected to feel at least some satisfaction, but to be honest all I felt was tired and, well, disgusted. What on the surface is a pleasant little bit of urban “green space” was, in reality, a thinly camouflaged rubbish dump. Some of it had surely been blown into the bushes and got stuck – a good case for public bins with some form of lid. The heavier items, though, had clearly been deliberately thrown in there. And while I’m glad I did the litter-pick, the fact that it was needed – and will be again before too long – is a pretty depressing state of affairs. On a more positive side, the local Brownie troop operating in the same patch were very impressed with how much I’d collected by the end of my session and stated “you should get paid” – though not keen on the career change just yet.

Wallingford 1155 have lots of photos of the large volume of litter which was picked up on Saturday on their facebook album if you want to see what a volunteer army of litter pickers can do in one morning.